I have been married to a narcissist for nearly 15 years.  Narcissism is a subset of mental illnesses referred to as Borderline Personality Disorder (301.83 DSM IV).  It is a pattern of thought and behavior centered on self-gratification at any cost.  There is no treatment, there is no cure.  It is not a chemical problem, but a behavior.  There are no words to adequately convey the depths of the journey I have taken to find and reclaim my right to myself.  If you find yourself relating to this too closely, please accept wisdom from one who has already paid the horrendous price for it.  DO NOT WALK, RUN!  It will never stop.  This is written from the perspective of my husband, based on actual things he has done and said, ways he has treated me, every day, for the last 16 years of my life...and though I have finally freed myself of his influence and damage, I hope you will all understand...though he has never resorted to violence, this is abuse on a very large scale, using the trust inherent in love to break and remold and rebreak and remold in an endless cycle, that spirals in the loss of self-worth, confidence, perspective and sanity. This is also a disorder that is becoming more and more pervasive in our society, and as such, we need to be aware.  Because if not for my children, and the understanding and validation given me by my parents...I'd have killed myself years ago.