A Letter To My Fiancee

As i lie in my bed,
I begin to ponder,
And my mind slips away,
To an unfamiliar place,
I'm sitting in the snow,
With my legs crossed,
And a book on my lap.
The words on the page,
Leap off and spin around me,
They flow through the air,
And begin to dance.
I begin to read them,
And they implant themselves in my mind.
They tell a story,
A story of my past,
One that i so longed to forget.
The words start to paint a scene,
And i see your face,
Starring back at me.
I run in fear,
For i dont want to hurt you agian.
I find myself in a dark room,
Cuddled in a corner,
Shaking in fear.
A soft dim light glows ahead,
And i start to hear, Someone crying.
I squint my eyes,
And there i see, You crying,
With the phone right beside you.
The the picture fades to grey,
And i find myself in another place.
I see a white corridor,
And i begin to walk down,
It's empty halls.
I come to a room, And there i see,
A nurse huddled over you,
Wrapping your wrist in gauze.
Then i flashback,
And i see you crouched in a corner,
With a razor blade in your hand.
I try to stop you...... I treid to save you.....
But it was to late,
And you glide the blade across your skin,
It glides so smooth,
Like a bird in the sky.
Then another image starts to play,
I see us, on that cold crisp night.
Hand in hand, Walking aganist the wind.
Then i see us under the catwalk,
Holding each other close to our hearts,
And that sweet kiss,
The one that made me realize,
You were the one.
All of these things poison my mind,
The memories of you,
And how you used to be.