The Death Sound

2 Comments

Tags:
  • Fear. Loss

    Poem Commentary

    I know the rythym is off on this one.  I can't focus well when I think about what happened.  I just jotted it down as best I could to try and get rid of some of the pain.

    My son was very sick, and everyone told me I was stupid and crazy and the boy just had a cold. 

    He didn't have a cold.  He had a massive cancerous tumor obstructing his airway.  They said if we had waited another day he would have died.  I don't know why his father listened to me that last time I called.  I'm glad he did.

    The Death Sound

     Again and again
    I saw you
    Struggling
    To breathe.

    And I recognized
    That sound.
    That's the death sound.

    I said to him
    Yes, I know
    What the doctors said.
    Take him again.
    They won't let me.
    I tried.

    Convincing
    Is no easy task
    When paperwork
    Is in the lack.
    Knowing I am not the one
    To solve this thing
    That must be done.

    Finally, he took him in
    Sheepishly, I saw you grin.
    Wan, you were
    So pale and weak.
    Firghtening
    It looked so bleak.

    Guilt arose
    And so did he
    Knowing that
    I knew, not he.

    Sobbing, asking
    How I knew
    I don't know
    I saw it through.

    What keeps him
    So angry
    With me?
    I spoke up
    So my son
    Could live.
    Why isn't that
    Enough?

    Enough of what?
    Control?
    Power?
    Greed?

    These invisible daggers
    Hit me
    And they
    Cut through
    My soul.

    What do you mean
    Let it go?
    Let what go?
    Let go of my son?

    And I'm
    Supposed to
    Walk around
    Like nothing's
    Wrong?

    That seems
    To please
    Everyone
    But me.

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    wheelsal commented on The Death Sound

    06-26-2009

    A story of loss so well said and deeply felt..........................................................
    Reply to Comment

    wheelsal

    06/26/2009

    Hope your son is doing well.

    StandingBear commented on The Death Sound

    06-26-2009

    A mother's instinct overrules many diagnosis. A stand up write from a lady with a stand up attitude.
    Reply to Comment

    frog

    06/26/2009

    That means so much to me. Thank you.

    A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness. It finds the thought and the thought finds the words.

    Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

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