Baritone

2 Comments

Poem Commentary

I am really sucky at titles. I must have written at least a hundred in my life that never even got a title.

Baritone

Liquid fire in his heart
Hands too soft to play the part
but if that fire turns to ice
the tears will flow not once, but twice

The passion play has found an end
For broken hearts that cannot mend
but if that heart turns in to stone
his fate will be to die alone

He knows not how to heal the hole
The true desire lives in his soul
But when desire has gone away
the worms move in and there they stay

A home that is broken when love leaves
Turns to ashes as it grieves
But when that home can stand no more
It then lives only
To close the door

So he begs the stars not to break
For the life he wants to take
But when his prayers remain unheard
The pain he feels
is only stiired

There is no song that he can hear
There is no fate he has to fear
But if love is not a part of it
Then death will be the heart of it

For he will see she does not know
Of all the things he cannot show
No bruises on his bended knees
Just unseen tears and silent pleas

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ApaqRasgirl commented on Baritone

09-22-2010

that was fantastic dear, so much passion and emotion in this with you rhyme, rhythm and metering flowed perfectly. wonderful read dear...........love asha

SerenityWintirs

09/23/2010

thank you. I am really glad that you liked it

MindNumbing commented on Baritone

09-22-2010

The rhyming and metering are nearly flawless in this one, and the emotional strain strengthens it that much more. You said you're sucky at titles... but the title is the exact reason I clicked on this... and I'm so glad ;)

SerenityWintirs

09/23/2010

Wow, thank you. I really had a hard time thinking of a title for this one but you have no idea how much it means to me that you took the time to read it

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

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