Cast Away Abel

2 Comments

Tags:
  • Life
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  • Anger
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  • Thought Provoking
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  • Thoughts

    Poem Commentary

    I grew up giving people the benefit of the doubt, and for the most part, I still do. But I refuse to just trust someone at their given word. I have seen to many people follow blindly, and I promise one of those people won't be me. I will loan you my respect and trust, but if you don't earn it in time, then you don't deserve it.

    Cast Away Abel

    Claim it for the love of another
    And quickly justify your bloodshed
    Do not question; mere puppets cannot talk
    Repeat your rhetoric of vain words said
    Cast away Abel, your foolish brother demands
    So you promptly retrieve your hammer,
    And crucify a man
    Forbidden is the man to mingle with a soul
    Mark his chest with a scarlet letter
    And never secondguess what your told
    Justice demanded from an innocent mind
    All while the only offender hoards his tangled lies.

    Poem Comments

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    dumplin commented on Cast Away Abel

    02-17-2010

    Do not take offense to this as it is my nature to point out little errors that you can correct in the future and make yourself a better writer, but you should learn the difference between your and you're. This is very lovely a piece, though. Keep up the good work!
    Reply to Comment

    danmartyjake1 commented on Cast Away Abel

    02-16-2010

    You craft a story so well, all while adding to the understanding and meaning of it through your woven passages. Beautifully designed! 10 from me!
    Reply to Comment

    In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

    Franz Kafka (1883-1924) Czech writer.

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