As you lay there biting away at your fingernails,
I speak to you the truth and nothing but.
You take my words as if a bullet from a Rail gun.
Voice shaking as you tell me that I am “Insensitive”.
“Emotionless“.
But I am not.
I can feel emotion.
I know the feeling of hurt. The feeling of betrayal. The feeing of anger.
And I know that you weren’t thinking about my emotions when you decided to lay with a stranger.
And as an introvert I can feel a sense of your pain.
If there was nothing for you to have lost, then what had you gained?
I wish this love for you would cease to remain.
I cant stop my tongue from releasing what my brain tells my heart to feel.
I cant help it that the nightmares I’ve had throughout life seemed to combine as one and become real.
I don’t love you.
I can’t love you.
Shit.
To say those things would be a lie.
And as you watch me,
My eyes grow a mind of their own,
And I begin to cry.
Inside the question “HOW COULD YOU?”
Is clouding my mind.
And I wish that I had the strength to speak out all that I am feeling at this moment in time,
But I feel as if I’d choke if I attempted to release another single word.
If you were as smart as you present yourself to be,
You’d know that anyone with a frontal lobe had emotions.
So bull shit is my response to you.
You managed to cross a line, I thought you refused to approach.
But Just like the thought that I’d found someone to love me,
I’ve failed the test with an obvious answer I should have known as wrong.