In response to Unstudly and his twisted perception of reality
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RE: In response to Unstudly and his twisted perception of realityQuote: Originally Posted by JadedJezzabel RE: The Death Of Original Poetry RIP UNStudly.......as usual you have got your self worked up into a twisted perception of reality...............I never offered for you to come back to OP under any name, as I DO NOT have the power to make such an offer......I am a mere guppy in this ocean of fish sharks shrimps crabs oysters and hump back whales............ The comment you think Elain posted on youtube stating she was proud of me for getting under your skin was posted by my friend Rachel who has never been a member of OP and can not even write a letter much less a poem.....She left that comment because the video you posted....your inverted lovesong was a perverted attempt to get my attention....it was posted to abuse and to scare me.....you must come with more than that UNstudly....In my life I have traveled down some dangerous roads and slept with men most would be afraid to allow them entry onto the street they live on much less the beds they sleep in......I have been in police raids and dope houses so thick with evil and of violence boiling just under the surface anyone with concern for thier own welfare would have ran screaming down the street and hiding in a closet for years to come.....On November 5th 2002, I was shot 9 times in my home by a smiling lunatic who giggled as he was attempting to kill me.....I tell you this not because I am proud of it....I'm not but it has made me the strong no bullshit fucking bitch i am today.......and I like who I am. So your twisted perception of reality about who I am and what I am about does not fase me one little bit....If any cares who i am and what I am about all they have to do is read my poetry which is written in no uncertain terms and leaves nothing for the imagination to ponder......You ask us to explain what we do and why we do it...........and I think Dha did exactly that with his challenge me poem.....which was a well said and quite an enjoyable rant..........as for me I do what I do and my reason for it is none of your damn business........If you can't figure it out from reading my poems then your are a disassociated sociopath with no concept of what inspires and motivates people. But here let me spell it out for you since you are so obssessed with what we do and why we do it.........I am an uneducated 42 year old woman who has survived and thrived in the underbelly of society and have been a propietor in the Las Vegas sex industry since I was 19 years old........that does not mean I am a hooker as I have never been on " a call " in my life.......I have never engaged in sexual activity for money as you have slanderously insinuated in the past........I write poetry because I'm pretty good at it and it gives me an outlet to express things I can't really express out loud.........I write of life lived on the fringes of society....of loving emotionally unavailable men.......of parents who blame them selves and do not understand why I have made the choices I have made......of sisters who are bi polar and nieces who break my heart and cause me much guilt for the examples I have given them.......of the long term effects of the drugs I've abused........of betrayal of lovers and friends and facination with sex and violence......I write of being a woman who is strong SELF EDUCATED hard as nails soft as melted butter and the strength of my character.........I write of a longing for a love I may never experience in this life time and my wish that I had been smart enough in my youth to see where the road I was speeding down was leading............I have not ever attacked you with out being provoked and frankly do not care enough about you to give you the sweat off my ass........I am addressing you at this time to explain to you what you have asked.....to say what I do and why I do it and to be a woman and stand by it.......I doing that because I want to not because i feel I owe your pathetic ass anything so do not get it twisted........you are a parasite who stands behind his intellect and wields it like a weapon on people who are not as educated and smart as you must think you are.........You have your ideas of what poetry is to you.......as you should......but when its different to someone else and they call you out on you narssatistic posture and your need for everyone to write as you chose to write or its not poetry.........you get ugly and on your poetic high horse of academic superiority. That to me is not poetic......it is not freedom of speech....its you and your better than everyone sense of your self....going on an academic rant of this is better than that is better than this.........when reality should tell you its all subjective man......I may not like what you like and someone else may not like what i like and who really gives a fuck...........not me........You do not cross my mind ever....until i see you tossing my name around this forum or you tube or where ever else you have imortalized me........then i just have to ask myself why this mutant of human dna has become so obsessed with me.......and then I smoke a bowl pondering on it for a very brief while and go back to living my life feathers unruffled by your insane obsession......I don't think of you again until the nextr time i stumble upon more of your craziness........you really should be on medication or locked away in a mental ward......or six feet under and out of your apparent misery.......it doesnt matter one way or the other to me......you are nothing but an image on the screen to me.......some malignant want to poet on the internet who thinks he has an effect on me...........wants to make me a victim of his scare tactics........you want to scare me UNstudly......you better try harder......you want to hurt me then pack a fucking lunch buddy and bring it.................and one more thing UNstudly........and pay attention because there might be a quiz...........LIFE AINT FUCKING FAIR BUDDY.....IT'S NOT FAIR YOU WERE BORN A MALADJUSTED SOCIALLY RETARDED LITTLE BOY WHO GREW INTO AN UGLY MALADJUSTED SOCIALLY RETARDED MAN....WHO BECOMES OBSESSED WITH PEOPLE WHO HE DOESN'T KNOW OUT OF ENVY AND AN INFLATED SENSE OF HIS OWN TALENT AND ENTITLEMENT.........BABIES CRY WHEN THEY SMELL YOU.......THE DEAF RECOILE AT THE SOUND OF YOUR VOICE AND THE BLIND CRY AT THE SUGGESTION OF YOUR ENERGY............YOU ARE A SOUR SOUL BENT ON CAUSING PROBLEMS EVERY WHERE YOU GO....A PRIEST WOULD WANT TO KICK YOUR ASS....... and for the record.....the oppisite of love is not hate....it's indifference Suzanna...you can't have two sets of rules. In a community, an injury to one is an injury to all. This is NOT what we have here. What we have here is a secret "society" that is conditional...conditional upon adherence to rules (very often unwritten) or a strict code, very similar to the "Skull and Bones" or the "Freemasonry" societies that infiltrate unions and literary clubs and fraternities, etc. I'd be remiss if I failed to mention the KKK. I appreciate you're sharing of yourself. I'm going to honor that. I'm not the horrible monster that you presume that I am...amd that's the whole problem! PRESUMPTION!!! Do you know how insidious and harmful that is? Why do you think I did my teaching thread??? BECAUSE OF YOU!!! You called me a faker!!! I proved you wrong, didn't I? I've seen this before. I know how it happens. If you check carefully, I tried to change this insidious wave of clannishness and exclusivity. I tried. Let's be honest; you're hostility towards me, and that of your "clique", HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH POETRY!!! Am I wrong? I understand the demographics. I understand the need for community, but we've LOST OUR WAY! The proof of that is-that were two sets of rules! That can't be! Not if it's about the poetry! Honey, I have counseled and helped young Eastern European women who were in the sex industry. (Why do you think Russian is so good?). I understand. I reached out to you. I apologized. I did! You can't deny it! You hit me when my hands were down! I've immortalized your response in one of my youtube video's "Cellphone Sonata" This is what you said to me...this is how you repiad my attempt at humility! Ask Erika. I reconciled with her. I tried to reconcile with dahlusion. You guys insisted on carrying on a vendetta against me...based upon PRESUMPTION THAT I WAS SOME KIND OF "SNOB"! This is not fair! I can prove my sincerity. I can "bring it" I've done it! How many people on this web site have I given my number to? How many people have I given help to ONLY WHEN THEY ASKED ME. You guys are not fair! A writer's mind should be open, but you guys are riddled with presumption and preconception! That is no good, sweetheart! No good! You're friend Rachel did you no good service, because you must look at how it's worded...look at the intent...clearly malicious. You must own up, honey. You must come clean. You must admit that you had a hatred that you could not control, which may have been influenced by outside factors. You should have come to me! I gave you signals. I gave you hints. You just nourished and clutched an image of a monster in your mind, heart and soul! this is not fair! You gave me no chance. You gave me no choice! Here you write a pretty good piece on which the premise was based on the evil of labeling people...yet what did you do??? YOU LABELED ME!!! GO BACK IN YOUR MIND AND HEART...WHY??? Do you even remember? You presented wome case against me that I had chased people off of the website? WHO??? I asked you! That was a sincere question! C'mon Suzanna...if we aspire to write on a higher level, we must cultivate the nature of being able to THINK on a higher level. THIS IS WHAT WE DO! WE GO DEEP. I'M TRYING TRYING TO GO DEEP WITH YOU NOW! You are quite correct about your finding that the opposite of love is indifference...which is precisely why OP should die. I WAS A COMMUNITY MEMBER. IF THIS WAS A REAL FUCKING COMMUNITY, AS THESE FUCKING ASSHOLES KEEP REPEATING AD INFINITUM, AD NAUSEUM, then how come nobocy asked you to back off!? Let's be honest, you should have been warned, at very least...Do you think I'm happy? Do you think that I like this? Do you think that I want OP to die? THINK AGAIN! i MUST END THIS, BECAUSE A GOOD TEACHER MUST NOT OVERLOAD HIS STUDENTS...i TAKE MY ROLE AS TEACHER VERY, VERY SERIOUSLY, because I actually love to teach even more than I love to write. I'm still trying to show you guys that you cannot have two sets of rules, and that you cannot be capricious, arbitrary and exclusionary in administering the rules. Clearly this has happened to a ridiculous degree. It was never addressed. That is why OP will die. |
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RE: In response to Unstudly and his twisted perception of realityLet me ask you...having a different poetic perspective...would that be sufficient grounds to vilify someone? Would it be suffieient grounds to demonize and ostracize, and to get into this whole high school "group" thing where you actually create REASONS to abuse someone...it is the insidious process of justification! I'm dealing with the Niedersachsen Polizeikommisar in trying to locate a young woman from the Ukraine who may have been the victim of human traffickers. It is hard. Look at my video..."Deutschland", it pretty much tells the story from the inside out. These are two ways of approach in poetry; from the inside OUT, and from the OUTSIDE in. This is Good! Rules? I didn't teach rules. I am not an "academic" poet-I am a "hybrid" poet, and much more of a "street" poet than any of these idiots who try to ordain themselves as "street" poets...they wouldn't last till lunch time on the street! Their asses would be grassed, their cell phones and laptops would be taken from them, and they'd be "rolled" just like a fucking biscuit! LOL C'mon! Look at the evidence. You only hate me because you really want to...it should be obvious to you that I do NOT hate you. What do I represent to you? What have I done? The irony here is that you are claiming to demonize me for reasons that relate to poetry, but in the final analysis, this persecution that you and your secret society have conducted against me, have, in fact, NOTHING TO DO WITH POETRY! Isn't it ironic? Yes I am a very smart boy; this is how I was born; however, you are at the mercy of your mind which has enslaved you and conditioned you to think in steroteypes. You have stereotyped me...and do you see how that has become your excuse for NOT GOING DEEP ie. research, knowledge and WISDOM! C'mon. suzy, REFLECT...search your soul. Your piece on "My Self Imposed Prison" was not so good, because it was too self indulgent, obvious and too maudlin. You can do better. The premise was not very clear nor relevant, and was in fact, a bit banal. You could do better. The piece that I wrote the day after my suicide attempt, "The Plant" is an example of how I took the focus OFF of myself, and transfered it onto a plain old potted plant that was "cowering" in the corner. The first rule of poetry: AVOID THE OBVIOUS! It would have been very easy for me to defecate across the page with my "feelings"...but, doesn't EVERYONE do that? In that particular piece, I did the old "* ball in the side pocket" billiard approach, in which I carefully used symbols in order to project the emotion and thus achieve the desired effect. This is good, solid poetic technique, and should not be "stereotyped and dismissed as being "academic". It works, Nuff said! Second rule: DARE TO BE DIFFERENT! I don't know if my poetry is good (even you have grudgingly admitted that it is, which took a lot, for which I am grateful), but all I know is that it is DIFFERENT!!! DARE TO BE DIFFERENT!! THIS WHAT I AM DOING IN FACING THIS "CHINESE GANG BANG" ON THE PART OF YOUR "FRIENDS"!!! I readily admit to you that this is NOT easy to do! I am from a very conservative, traditional Portuguese Catholic bacground, and my folks were scared to death of EVERYTHING! We were conditioned for FEAR!!! Here is rule NO. 3...TAKE RISKS! Roll the fucking dice...for fuck sakes, you're in VEGAS!!! THEY ROLL THE FUCKING DICE ALL THE TIME! LOL Don't let fear paralize you, and don't let stereotypes and prejudice limit you, and to keep you from the higher level thinking and contemplation that effective and compelling writing demands and requires. Very, very important! Forget the source...just STEAL THE GOODS! LOL You hate the source (me), but just take the treasure (counsel and wisdom)...covet it, take it, snatch it, and RUN LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER BEFORE SOMEBODY STEALS IT FROM YOU!!! Last edited by feldmarschal 01-26-2011 at 05:52:51 AM |
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RE: RE:Quote: Originally Posted by JadedJezzabel I don't like you because you are a lunatic. no one wants you here....go crawl back under your rock. Define "lunatic". And I own my home, dear heart, so I do not require a rock. So kindly put yourself on display, and show us exactly what quality of person you are! LOL Define "lunatic" and make sure you really get "into it" because the judge will really be interested in knowing why you chose to violate both state and Federal law because of YOUR perception of me! So go ahead, honey! Knock yourself out!       
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RE:Let me just state for the record that I have a Facebook page, which over 80 friens and share poetry with them as well as critique poetry. I am a member of five other poetry websites, the wordcloud.org, gotpoetry.com moontowntowncafe.com writingwithrandom.com and poetrysuperhighway.com, where I have twice won awards. I read my poetry three times a week on blogtalkradio, and have been very well received. I only state this for the record in order to prove how ireesponsible and totally devoid of integrity you are. I am a respected community member, a homeowner, and am know as a peaceful man. The reason things have gotten out of hand here is because of two standards. Your posting against me which precipitated this entire situation, was an entirely personal and gratuitous assault designed to cause me harm. You stated as much. I am not here to please you. You are not my wife, daughter, or anyone I would want to ever cross paths with, because I don't deal with liars. I am not the problem. You are the problem, and all those who have stuck their noses in where it didn't belong. I don't owe you or anybody else on this horrible boneyard of a web site, any explanations for my behavior. Suffice it to say, that you, pall wall, gumby, could never get away with the kind of abuse and double standard that you have subjected me to. For example, Helios was viciously attacked by dahlusion. Why have you not mentioned that? You see, OP is plagued by unfairness and a double standard. You cannot have two sets of rules. After all of the crap that you have posted which were clearly violative of forum rules, the very fact that you were not deleted is ample testimony as the gross unfairness on the part of OP administration. I think that they have come to realize this. I am not a trouble maker, and I have a record of peace and reconciliation with my adversaries that I can demonstrate, thus making a liar out of you, tender poison, aria, dahlusion, madelynn, suspence, artie, and the rest of you bigoted xenophobes. You just don't like "my kind". If five liars support one liar, it's still a lie! If 100 liars all tell the same lie, it won't make it true! This is what has happened, and this has been the source of the negativity that has now gripped OP. These people I have mentioned, I have not attacked publicly, but yet they circulate the same lies amd innuendo that you have been smearing me with for over a year. You keep hammering away at my mental history; unless there's an MD after your name, I suggest that you fools lay off, because you're in vilation of Federal law. You and these other fools hate me because you want to hate me, and you think that I'm an easy mark and that I'm going to go "nuts". Guess again, mein Schatz! I have filed a report with the appropriate authorities and will continue to file reports. I just decided that I wan't going to take your shit anymore! Here's the double standard at work; I can be attacked, I can be vilified, my mental history and my health in general can be paraded, entirely against Forum rules, but yet, if I should respond, I am labeled as "disturbed" and "sick", etc. Reasonable people don't act the wau you people are acting. I have appealed, I have apologized, I have done everything that I can to help the poets here. You and your stooges talk and talk and talk, but your words have no substance since they have no basis in fact. I prove you as a liar over and over and over again, but still one of your dweebs repeats the same lie over and over and over again. This is a source of great frustration, and I submit to you that it is purposeful. This clique is engaging in organized and methodical campaign to subject me to mental cruelty through mental abuse. It's not going to work. I am better than you, not because I have raised myself above you, but because you have lowered yourself beneath me. You should not be on this site, you should have been thrown off. I was looking through Volume 1 of the OP Anthology, and saw so many poets that were no longer active on OP. In several cases, I happen to know that you had something to do with their departure. So you are a damnable hypocrite, a troublemaker, a loser, and a giant fraud, but yet you are so "popular". If it were about the poetry, you would have been thrown off, which is why OP should die, because it is not about the poetry anymore. Any reasonable person can see who the real "lunatic" is here, and it isn't me, suka-just look in the mirror. |
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This Is What I'm Being Subjected To What are the "charges" against me? What have I done? Attacking people? Who's attacking who? |
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RE:wow you have stooped to a new low.......you need medication or something. |
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RE:But it is you who have sunk to the lowest depths. These are your very words. Are they not? Can you not take responsibility for what you say and do? |
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RE:what ever freak.......looks like it was you who posted that reply....does it not. now when you dont get a reaction you create your own.......nice. |
If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry.
Emily Dickinson (1830-1886) American poet.