This is...

This is about the way we are, not the way we used to be.
This is how you look at me, with such disdain in your eyes.
How I can't compare to those other guys.
This is about all those years, you told me you liked me, and now brought me to tears.
This is for all these times you've rolled your eyes when I talk, the way you say I'm an obvious fag just from the way I walk.

This is for all the times, I've done something that I didn't want you to do, and you just make a random noise, not even a thank you.
This is for all the years, those comments that in your eyes, you said I was attractive to you, and now I find them lies.
This is for the time you let me give you head, knowing how bad i wanted you and not saying no instead.

This is for the times I want to slit my wrist, this is for all the eternal time at me you are pissed.
This is for me understanding, that I don't have a job.
This is for you always acting like a knob.
This is for me writing, and pouring out my soul, and this is for you not caring, making my heart not whole.
This is for the friendship, that now is down the drain, this is for what was, and never will again.

This is for me wishing, that someone else I could be, this is for me wishing, like the past we could be.
This is for me knowing, that I don't have a chance, this is for me giving up and throwing up my hands. This is for me telling, that no matter what you do, no matter how you look at me I will always love you. This is for the way you treated me like a toy, this is for the regret I feel, not being your perfect boy.

This is for the times, you've ever brought me off.
This is for my worry at your ever nagging cough.
This is for the ends that you keep in this ashtray, this is for me worry that they'll make you go away. This is for the way that I never see you smile, this is for the way I do your laundry in a pile.
This is for the times that we always used to talk.
This is for those times you let me suck your cock.

This is for repetition, that goes over and over in my head.
This is for those constant thoughts, it'd be better if I were dead.
This is for the others, who always had a chance, this is for the things you said that made me want to dance.

This is for my regret, that sooner we didn't meet, this is for the time at Play that you seemed so sweet. This is for how touchy feely you did be, this is for me driving up and learning you never did want me. This is for that god damn spark, that started this, it all.
This is for the times you'll never catch me if I fall.

This is for me faltering, because its getting late, this is for me saying, that even if i never have a chance, I know that i'll still wait.
This is for you, you my former friend, to let you know no matter what, this love will never end.