Original Poetry Forums

Letting Go

05-18-2013 at 11:56:59 PM

Letting Go

Loving someone yet having to let them go can make one's heart heavy,
Causing tears to flow like the ocean through a broken levee.
For you, there's nothing in this world I would not do nor give
Which makes this the hardest decision I will make as long as I live.
If I thought for one moment my efforts would make you see me the way I see you,
Letting go would be the last thing that I would do.
If I thought my love could open your heart to mine,
Then maybe I could know we would be fine.
If I thought my tears would save us from a goodbye,
Then for you a thousand rivers you would see me cry.
I cannot imagine any of this will bring you to love me too,
So I'll show you just how much I truly do love you.
Through teary eyes and with a broken heart I set you free,
But always hoping one day you will see we are meant to be!!!



*Feedback appreciated

06-05-2013 at 04:42:27 PM

RE: Letting Go

I feel the second line ending in levee is a little forced. You can just see the thought process behind making something rhyme with heavy. Hmmm, I might be guilty of the same thing in some of my writes. If I am please tell me what you think.

The rest seems to flow alright. I just not a big fan of this kind of second person writing.

To have great poets there must be great audiences too.

Walt Whitman, American Poet (1819-1892)